Yoga Daddy!

I am almost certain there is a passage from the Torah, Bible, Koran or some other religious text that addresses elderly parents in the following manner: Thou shalt not now, nor ever heed the advice of thy adult children.
You know what I'm talkin' about!!!
So, it had to be a family member once removed...a much more reliable source of information  (never mind his drug and alcohol history!!!) that suggested my dad look into yoga. The relative gave dad an article from, where else, the New York Times written by non other than a JEWISH DOCTOR!!! The guy had spent time in India and as a result rx'd yoga as part of his patients wellness care. Armed with a tiny bit of info. from a virtual stranger, dad was good to go for his first chair yoga class. I wish you could have seen him...cute as all get out. Dressed in his daily uniform of khakis, leather belt, button down oxford shirt, swanky yellow lensed glasses and his going out sneakers he was ready for action. I could tell he was both nervous and curious about his first class. When we arrived I spoke briefly to the teacher then escorted dad inside. I stayed while he got settled in and told him I would return to pick him up when class was over. When I arrived to pick him up he was chatting away with the teacher who was giving him some fun and interesting yoga facts. His hair, normally plastered flat to his head was sticking up in little tufts, his demeanor was lighter and he had a slight bounce in his step. As we were driving home I asked him what he thought about the class and he responded with: "I probably should have started a long time ago." Overtly, I tried to appear cool and non-invested but inside I was jumping for joy. For so many reasons my dad needs this class and I was very relieved that he found it interesting enough to try it again.
The second time I took him he confidently walked in, got some blocks and parked himself in his same chair. Tears welled up in my eyes...partly from happiness/relief that he was doing something to take care of himself...and partly from how proud I felt of him. Here he was, an 88 yer old conservative, midwestern guy who was wiling to check out this foreign practice called yoga. At home later that morning I asked him about class. He did a reinactment of some of the postures making sure to tell me the correct times to be breathing in and out. He wondered aloud if the teacher could give him some hand outs so he could practice at home :) Then he said: "the teacher rang these little bells and we were supposed to quiet our minds...then we breathed in the good thoughts and breathed out the bad ones. I wished we'd done that part longer." In that moment I felt such pure love and appreciation for my dad.

The Show Me State

I know that I live in a particularly left part of the country. You can find a little bit of everything round these parts. Kansas City, however, is another story. While progressive in some arenas, the collective consciousness is pretty dang dense. So, it should have come as no surprise that when I asked the TSA folks at the airport to hand check a little bag of essences that I instantly became a high risk passenger! Jeezo peezo. I handed the guy the bag of essences and then i was told i had to go thru the body scanner. Great. As soon as I was released from that procedure the guy said to me that because of the bag, they were going to have to pat me down. And the first thought in my head is: "if you think you are going to lay one of your 'mr. creepy man hands on my body, you are in for a fight.'
Fortunately for everyone he turned me over to two women. The first was the one who was going to actually do the pat down. As she was snapping on those icky rubber gloves (blue for those of you that care) she was describing in great detail where and how she was going to be touching my body...which by now is sweating profusely! Next to her stood a woman who looked like an older butch lesbian (BL). She was the bulldog security mama and was standing no more than a foot from me. Both of them were SO in my personal space that I was kinda wishing when they'd told me i had to be pat down i had taken my chances and bolted...this was excruciating. I was trying my best to find the humor in the situation...as i took the macro view it all seemed surreal and I smirked which i'm sure made me even more suspicious cuz it was right about the time that woman number one began the exam. However, she did have a good touch and i thought to myself that she'd make a decent bodyworker! So, she completed my back side and as she stepped in front of me to begin the front I said to her: "this is kind of an unusual job, isn't it?" She answered that it was but didn't miss a beat with the exam. She then moved to touch a part of my body that I just don't like to have touched and I instinctively recoiled. The BL lurched at me as if I was about to set off a bomb and it was her job to stop me!!! It wasn't all that funny in the moment but afterwards I found it hysterical. Anyways, because of that incident I had to go to a private room and explain myself to the female supervisor. Talk about sweating. My fear was that the babe was gonna force the issue, it was gonna get ugly very quickly and I would have to call my folks from jail! But to her credit she resolved it easily and then the four of us marched out of the private room as if in a parade!

Oh Lordy!!!

I need to get out more often!
I was waiting in the security line at the Oakland airport this a.m. and engaging in some serious people watching. (and no, contrary to what some of you might assume I was NOT scopin' out the g's!!!) I was just observing and being entertained. Until I noticed this woman...one couldn't help but notice her. Yes she was attractive and I did notice that (whatever!) but there was a particular energy about her...so light filled and radiant...TOTALLY  caught my attention. She was far enuf away that I couldn't see details but once she was closer I about had a heart attack cuz I was just sure it was Diana Jones (see music section of my profile for further info) I was trying my best to remain calm! I was staring hard at her and then finally came to the conclusion that it was not Diana for she did not have a guitar with her and she looked just a wee bit older than Diana. However, this woman was a charming and irresistable cross between Diana and Jessica Lange (I'm not bragging or anything but I was co-founder of the Jessica Lange fan club in the 80"s) Anyways, even tho it wasn't Diana, I still watched her go thru security and off to her plane. Done deal.
I am headed for my already boarding flight and realize I had to use the facilities in a big way so did a U-turn to make a last minute dash...and there in front of me is Miss Dazzle Pants herself!!! As we pass each other we make eye contact and shared one of those moments...you know, where your entire being lights up and you could just about explode...time stops...and then the next moment is there and I turn into the bathroom short of breath and sweating...telling myself to just keep walking! I about knocked myself out trying to get into the stall I was so happily distressed! I made myself take a couple of deep breaths to try and calm my nerves! And then I saw her AGAIN sitting at my gate. I really wanted to have the juevos to go introduce myself but my legs would not walk in her direction, dangit! Heck, I couldn't even look at her again.
I might be a lost cause in this dep't. Let us pray!!!

Oh Happy Day

I had the sweet fortune of waking up the other day to find a newly born calf asleep behind my cabin. The little bundle stayed in basically the same position for about 3 hours...fast asleep in the sunshine...opening an eye now and again or repositioning her head. Finally, the mama came around mooing insistantly and very loudly and stopped about 20 feet away from her baby. The friend that I was talking with on the phone said the mama stops a ways away on purpose so that the calf has to actually use her new legs to get up and walk to her. Well, the little gal got up on those brand spanking new legs, wobbled a wee bit and then in a drunken weave made her way over to her mama for breakfast.
Oh happy day!

Jam Glam!

I figure once you hit 97 years old you get to do pretty much anything you want. So yesterday when my friend, Helen, decided she wanted to wear her brightly colored flannel jams into town, I was down with the program.
One of the other things about being 97 is that no matter what you do, people think it is facinating/inspiring that you are still upright! So, the fact that she was going to yoga class in her jams... well, that right there made for some seriously good role modeling!!!

Moo Vittles

Art Day

an afternoon spent in the garden eating yummy food, visiting, laughing and making "art"...was a relaxing, light-hearted and entertaining time. In the photo above meet "the blockheads" who presided over the day...they were quiet yet watch-full and set just the right tone!!

This is fish-lips...
one of many inspired creations here at art day!
(in case you can't tell from the photo, it is made out of a gourd with a variety of plant materials to adorn her fishy body!)

Alert!

RedVines are NOT a vegetable.

MOO'S in The Hood!

Planet West County

For those of you not familiar with western Sonoma County where I live, I want to try and paint you a picture of it...for it will be an amusing backdrop when at the end, I tell you what I saw here today.
First of all, if you are in the know, you call it West County. That in itself means something especially when said with a particular attitude. The characters that inhabit this area are...ummmmm...color-full? There's an interesting mix of peeps...which seems to mostly work...well, in the sense that people don't tend to kill each other at least! anyways, on any given day you might find yer spiritual seekers, new age space rangers, arteests, homahsexuals, maryjuana growers and smokers, therapy junkies, red necks, xtreme lefty zealots, aging hippies (the men still sport pony tails and Birkenstocks and the gals long flowey dresses with hairy arm pits), the young hippies wear dreads and don't shower so much, old timey farmers, rich yuppies and then yer assorted wing nuts and whack jobs. So, it did NOT phase me to see an entire family in town today ALL wearing tye dye shirts!!! No joke. However, I did laugh out loud and wonder if they were part of a cult!